Sunday, January 22, 2012

Someone Has to Go First

Follow my Leader, David Reekie, 2003
Image via Wikipedia

I am always baffled by the people who will wait overnight outside a store to get a new phone, toy, or electronic device, or people who try every means possible to be among the first to secure tickets to a sporting event or concert.Yet, some of those same individuals would never think of being the ring-leader when it comes to supporting a cause, delivering an opinion that goes against the mainstream or even changing the direction their life is going. It's as though being first when the crowd who follows you into an arena to cheer on your favorite team is a more noble act than being first when the move you make can change your life. Sure, it may be less popular to be the one who goes first in some situations but when it might change your life or at least the direction it is going, whenever it may lead to something you always dreamed of reaching, whenever it might be the impetus that finally gets you out of a rut, the decision should be a no-brainer.

If you are serious about really living your passion or even discovering your passion, you will most certainly have to make some moves without a large fan base. You will probably discover that any move to make changes will be met with some resistance from those who want to keep the status quo. Last year, a good friend of mine walked away from a situation she had complained about and  attempted to change for over a decade. Few people thought it was in her best interest despite the fact that she had lost her clarity, perspective and purpose for her life while she did everything in her power to try and make things better. In the end, she had to be the first to let go. It was difficult, painful and not without obstacles. She had some moments of second guessing herself, but today wholeheartedly states, "I only wish I would've done this years ago. I wasted so much time, thinking I had so few options."

Kennedy Space Center - First man on the Moon
Image by Fabio - Miami via Flickr

Maybe you have tried many ways to make something work or feel comfortable that just isn't doing it for you. Whether it is your career, your lifestyle, you leisure pursuits and sometimes even your relationships with others, if it isn't improving or you do not get satisfaction from it, it is time for a change. You know you need to go first and make the move that makes the difference. Maybe it means choosing a different work venue, changing the scenery in your life, perhaps even letting go of whomever you are spending your time with. 

Anything worth saving, is certainly worth the fight, but you really have to ask yourself sometimes if what you are fighting for is something you want to win. If it the one who goes first to claim it as your own, but if not, have the guts to walk away first and stop pretending it matters.

Yes, life is all about picking your battles. Someone has to pick first, fight first, forgive first, leave first and change first. 
Follow your heart
Image by aftab. via Flickr


By the way, someone already went first in following this blog, so you won't have to be the first to make the tough decision, but I hope you will be the next and the next.

And I hope you share the kinds of things you hope to see discussed in "finding your fire."


  1. So so true Kathy, a really thoughtful post. I think it is fear that holds so many of us back in areas of our and light told me years ago...feel the fear and do it anyway. Loving you positivity in all you do. Now following u on Twitter / FB and RSS this feed too. I am at Http:// and also on T and FB as AscensionForYou too...hope we can connect again....loved the One more serving 12 days of Xmas by the way to. God Bless and good luck , Dave

  2. Thanks Dave for your generous comments and the time you take to read and follow. I hope I can continue to produce writing that inspires.

  3. Absolutely true, Kathy. This is just what so many of us need to hear. One more thing... once you take the first scarey leap, moving out of your comfort zone into the unknown gets a little easier every time.

  4. Love your blog and "going first" is pretty much what my newest book is all about--people who who refused to conform to the societal beliefs and expectations of their time and, by stepping out and away from the crowd, they changed their world and ours as well. I think it's all about discovering our passion and persevering to the end. Great blog and I'll be back!

  5. Great article Kathy! It's so true but so easy to forget! I miss you!!!!

  6. Lynne, Yes, it's scary if you take the leap and sometimes just as much if you don't.

    Sandra, Thanks for the great comment and it sounds like your book will be a great read.

    Ravenous, Thanks for reading and yes, we need a get together.

    Sorry for the group reply. Blogger decided to eliminate the comment box for a while last week!!

  7. Kathy, I love your pictures throughout your blog. Your theme touches into the theme of my new book, "What's Behind Your Belly Button?", on gut instincts and how it has always been there guiding you toward the authentic self, beginning in early childhood. Actually, I can really relate personally to what you are saying here about being the first because proposing something new in the field of Psychology is "gutsy". Your book sounds like a great read! I think you really have something people can relate to and will love connecting into. I'll be back to check on your blog and see how your new experience with this wonderful book is going!

    I am a LinkedIn associate of yours (that is how I found your blog). Would love it if you would visit my blog too at:
    and please take a look at my book "What's Behind Your Belly Button?" at:

    Martha Love

  8. Martha,
    Thank you for your comments. I hope you continue to read and give your feedback. Yes, those who are trailblazers often must have "tough skin"